Horoscopes Are A Drag™

Honey, "Horoscopes Are A Drag" on QVegas is your go-to for that sparkle of cosmic tea, served hot and fabulous, straight from the stars with a glittering twist. Each week, we're spilling the celestial secrets for every zodiac sign, so you can strut your stuff with the stars aligning just right. It's astrology with sass, glam, and a dash of drag magic, making your cosmic journey as dazzling as a drag queen's wardrobe. For your weekly dose of star-studded advice, click your heels and head over every week, darling!

aries

Oh, honey, the stars are absolutely living for you this week! Aries, you better sashay down that runway of life because energy is serving you all the charisma, uniqueness, nerve, and talent in the universe. You're gonna find opportunities popping up like sequins on a drag queen's gown, so snap 'em up and twirl with them, darling. And when it comes to love? Ooh, you're hotter than a lip-sync for your life. So, pucker up, because passion is calling your name, and it wants an encore. Go ahead and own it, because this week, you're the star, baby! Werk it! 🌟💋

taurus

Honey, let me spill the tea for you. This week, starting June 9, 2024, all you Taurus beauties better get your glitter on because the universe is serving you a platter of cosmic delicacies, hunty! You're gonna be feeling like the fierce queen you are, strutting down the catwalk of life with all eyes on you. Opportunities are gonna sashay right into your lap, so don't be shy – flaunt it, own it, and werk it, darling! It's your time to shine brighter than a disco ball at a ballroom bash. Remember, stars may guide you, but it's that Taurus tenacity and flair that'll make you the main event. Slay all week, my fabulous bull! Mwah!

gemini

Gemini, honey, you better buckle up because this week is gonna be like riding a glitter-studded roller coaster! The stars are throwing you some cosmic shade early in the week, so don't let any workplace drama dull your sparkle. By midweek, the universe is serving you a hot plate of flirtation and fun - it's time to slay, baby! Embrace your inner diva, throw on some sequins, and let the world know who's queen. And remember, when it comes to your personal life, communication is key, darling - don't be afraid to speak your truth. By the end of the week, take a moment to pamper yourself, because let's face it, you're fabulous and you deserve it. Keep strutting that runway, Gemini, because this week is all about showing everyone that nobody does it better. Mwah!

cancer

Alright, my darling celestial crabs, listen up 'cause your Auntie Queen of Cosmos is spilling the tea for the week of June 9th, 2024! Honey, this week, the universe is serving you a platter of opportunities, so you better werk and strut your stuff! You've been hiding that fabulous shell of yours for too long, and it's time to let the world see your glow-up. Expect a dash of drama - but you, my glamorous Cancer, were born to turn lemons into lemonade, or better yet, a sickening cocktail. Love is knocking on your door louder than a drag queen's heels on a hardwood floor, so fluff that wig and be ready! And don’t forget, manage that coin like you're the star of your own budget extravaganza show. Remember, confidence is your best accessory, so sashay away any doubts, 'cause this week, you're snatching wigs and hearts!

leo

Honey, let me spill the cosmic tea for you, darling. This week, the stars are aligning, and they're all about giving you that fierce Leo energy. It's time to strut your stuff, because the universe is throwing the spotlight right on you. You're gonna be serving looks, charisma, and a whole lot of fabulousness. So, put on those heels, fluff up that mane, and sashay into your week, because, honey, you were born to shine. Remember, in the grand ballroom of life, you're the headlining diva this week, so own it, work it, and let everyone gag on your eleganza! 💅✨

virgo

Alright, honey, gather ‘round because Auntie Universe is about to spill the cosmic tea for all you Virgo divas out there. Now, as we strut our way into the week of September 6th, 2024, you better get those heels clicking, because it's time to work that fabulous energy you've been hiding under that sequinned cloak. The stars are aligning to give you that extra sizzle in your step, so let’s not be shy about it. Whether you're navigating the runway of your career or the catwalk of your personal life, throw on that confidence like it’s the finest feather boa. Remember, you are fierce, fabulous, and ready to conquer. So, bat those eyelashes, adjust that crown, and let the world see you sparkle. It’s not just about making an entrance, darling, it's about leaving a glittering impression they will never forget. Let’s show them how it’s done, Virgo, because this week, you’re not just participating in life, you are owning the stage!

libra

Alright, henny, buckle up because this week is all about finding your balance—which, for you gorgeous Libras, is practically your middle name, but this week, honey, it’s like walking in six-inch heels on a cobblestone street. The stars are throwing some shade, forcing you to sashay away from conflict and focus on channeling that inner goddess of harmony. You've got some decisions coming your way, so put on that crown, adjust your lashes, and make those choices with all the grace and fierceness only a Libra can serve. Remember, darling, it’s not just about looking fierce on the outside, but feeling it on the inside too. Werk it out, step by step, because this week is all about strutting into your power. You got this, queen!

scorpio

Alright, dah-lings, gather 'round because your Auntie Sparkle is about to read the stars for all you sultry Scorpios for the week of June 9, 2024. Honey, you are in for a week that is as dazzling as a sequin gown under disco lights! The universe is serving you a cocktail of opportunities, so strut into that spotlight where you belong. You've got the charisma, uniqueness, nerve, and talent to make anything happen. Remember, when life throws you shade, throw glitter back, because this week, you're not just participating, darling, you're stealing the show. So, puff up that feather boa, adjust that crown, and sashay down life's runway with all the confidence of a queen who knows her stars are aligned for fabulousness. Yes, Gawd!

sagittarius

Honey, let me spill the celestial tea for all you Sagittarius divas out there! This week, starting June 9, 2024, you're about to sashay away through a cosmic runway like never before. The stars are lining up to serve you some realness, so flutter those lashes and get your sparkle on because it's time to shine, darling! You're going to face some twists, twirls, and possibly a few dips, but remember, in the world of drag and life, it's all about how you make that comeback. So put on those heels, fluff up that wig, and get ready to gag the universe with your fabulousness. You're not just participating, honey, you're here to win! Now, let's turn this week out!

aquarius

Honey, this week is about to be a cosmic extravaganza for my Aquarius darlings! You better get those sequins ready because opportunity is knocking on your door with a rhinestone-covered hammer. The universe is serving you a platter of fabulous chances to shine brighter than a disco ball. Social vibes are in the air, so flutter those lashes and mingle, because your network is about to be as dazzling as your highlighter. Watch out though, sugar, balance is key; don't overdo the glitter. Remember, darling, confidence is your best accessory, so strut into this week like the runway is yours. Werk it, Aquarius, because the stars are aligning in your favor!

pisces

Oh honey, buckle up ‘cause this week is gonna be a sparkling rollercoaster ride for all you fabulous Pisces fish out there! The stars are aligning and they are serving some major cosmic tea, darling. You better werk that charm because your social circle is about to expand, mmkay? But listen up, diva - watch that slippery tongue of yours or you might spill the wrong tea! Keep those fins polished and that mind open, 'cause opportunities are about to sashay your way. Embrace it all, darling, 'cause this week, you're the star of the show. And remember, keep it fierce and fabulous, always!

capricorn

Alright, honey, let's dive into the tea for all you fierce Capricorns out there, because the stars have got a cosmic runway planned for you this week, starting on June 9th, 2024! This is the moment, darling, to strut your stuff like the world is your stage. Ambition? You're oozing with it, and it's your time to shine, sparkle, and show them all how it's done. But remember, babe, balance is key – don't let all that hard work mess with your fabulous self-care routine. Your energy is a priceless jewel, so don't go throwing it at just anything or anyone that doesn't deserve your fabulousness. And in love? Keep those eyes open, because romance is about to dance into your life, leaving you absolutely gagging. So get ready, Capricorn, because this week, you're not just walking, you're sashaying through life, leaving a trail of glitter in your wake. Werk it!